Desk Job Zombie

I have turned into a boring person.  I think part of it is that my job is sucking the life out of me. I like my job, don't get me wrong.  I work with great people and for a great group of doctors  However I kind of feel like its turning me into a boring person with nothing to talk about that would interest anyone outside my field. The things I do have to talk about are so boring to even me that some days that I'm not even motivated to talk about them.   I sit at a desk all day staring at a computer, numbers and mostly bland politically correct medical records.  It's extremely sad that I look forward to the random note a doctor has slipped in that probably shouldn't be there. The ones where he actually describes a condition or personality of a patient in the exact way he sees it.   In these days of the frequent medical malpractice lawsuits, those are very rare.   So most days I sit at a computer without speaking to anyone for long lengths of time, reading op report after op report and typing code after code and by the end of the day I feel like a zombie.  It's hard to even relate to people sometimes at the end of these days.  I just stare at them numbly and they eventually stop talking to me.   Then I come home and leave it behind. But then another type of situation takes over. Chuck and I have a great routine.  We know how most of our evenings will go.  Dinner, bath time for the kids, small quiet playtime, read to the kids, kids bedtime and then we have about an hour or so left before our own bedtime. It works for us but more importantly it works for the kids. They know what to expect. There is no complaining at bedtime. No negotiating. It's how it is and we all know it. Sometimes though I feel like this is making me dull too. I love my home life.  It's safe, it's comfortable and full of people I love and love me back.  But I miss adventure. I miss picking up and doing something completely random, completely unplanned. Maybe this is the life of a working mom of two small kids. But I need some balance.  I think about some of the crazy things I did in high school, college, prior to kids and I miss it. I miss the stories.  You hear people say that this is what happens when you get married and settle down but I don't believe it. I believe there are still adventures to be had in our daily life.   My New Years resolution this year is to add that adventure back into my life. I'm not sure how or where to start but this is the beginning...as long as it doesn't interfere with my bedtime.

Leave it to Charlie Brown

I’d like to get a little something out of the way first. It has obviously been a really long time since I’ve posted here. I wasn’t even entirely sure I remembered my login to tell the truth. I’m sure there aren’t many (if any) people that still even remember that I have this blog or would even think to check for an update. Those that do stumble across it, I’m glad you found it. I intend to start posting again. We’ll see how that goes…
Tonight my 3 year old daughter asked to watch the Charlie Brown Christmas special that we happen to have on DVD. This is no reflection of her readiness for Christmas since she asks for it year round but as I sat down in front of the TV to put the DVD in for her, I found myself wanting to watch it. Normally this time of year, I groan at all the decorations and music I hear as I’m out and about. I’m typically never ready to even discuss Christmas until after Thanksgiving.
This year I feel a little differently though. I can’t say that I’m quite ready to embrace it, but I haven’t minded it as much. Maybe it’s the “Big Eastern Syndicate” finally getting to me…the same people that push Christmas on us earlier and earlier every year. However I don’t think so. I think as I’ve gotten older I just miss my childhood more and more.
As I sat down in front of my TV tonight and the first scene of Charlie Brown came on, with the snow and the music we all know too well, it washed over me. I closed my eyes and felt myself back in my family’s living room at 8 or so years old. I could feel my fuzzy winter pajamas and see the multicolored Christmas tree to my right. I could feel, hear and smell the wood burning stove that I always hated as a kid but now just feels like home. The overall feeling of happiness and security that memory gave me was a strong one. It was only for a second before I snapped myself out of it and went back to folding the laundry that I had previously been working on while Corinne snuggled up in our recliner in the living room. At first it left me incredibly sad. My childhood “home” doesn’t exist any longer. My parents divorced when I was in college and my family changed. Though some family still lives there, I can’t ever go back to what was my home as a kid. There aren’t many people that probably can, I guess. Once the temporary sadness passed, it made me realize just how lucky I am to have had a happy and healthy childhood. There are so many adults that can’t say that. So many children currently living in a world of instability…and worse.
These are obviously not groundbreaking thoughts but ones that reminded me of just how important it is to be the best parent I can be. What memories will my kids have of their childhood home and their childhood in general? Will they be as warm and fuzzy? Do Chuck and I give them that overall sense of love? I hope so. I hope their memories of our family’s metaphorical wood-burning stove will bring them back to a time and a place they can remember with the same amount of warmth. I don’t believe much matters beyond that.

SpiderAsh

My nephew, Ashtin, sings the Spiderman theme song.



Spiderman, spiderman, does whatever a spider can.
Spins a web, any size. Catches thieves, just like flies.
Hey there, there goes Spiderman!

Our busy summer

Man, I've been busy since I last posted here. This summer seems to just be flying by. We had our bathroom remodeled over the past couple weeks and wow, it looks a million times better. Who knew getting the old vanity (that had chew marks from Webster) out of there could make such a difference? Yes, he chewed the side of the vanity. Apparently he hated the thing as much as we did. Redoing a room always amazes me how long we will tolerate an awful and embarrassing room as long as we do. Really, the flooring didn't even go from wall to wall. If you've never seen it, I'll just let you imagine that in your mind for a minute. But! We no longer have a trashy bathroom. Yay us!

Let's see, what else has been going on...oh right! We got new backyard furniture. I love it, even though we haven't had much opportunity to enjoy it with all this rain.

Other than that, not much has been going on. I've just been sitting around the house, not going to work, getting small amounts of sleep, and catering to the needs of our most exciting bit of news. Miss Corinne is here!!



I had her on June 5th and she's just absolutely amazing. I was admitted to the hospital on the 4th to be induced. They started the pitocin the morning of the 5th and we had her at 12:06. It was a piece of cake compared to Chase's birth. I'm talking maybe 10 minutes of pushing, if that. I was a little out of it so I don't have an exact timetable but it was short. I couldn't have asked for an easier delivery. Things are going very well and actually I can't believe it's already been 4 weeks. Chase is doing well with her, though he has been acting out a little. Since when does he throw a temper tantrum in Target? I don't know but it's getting a little old. I was THAT mom the other day. You know, the one with the screaming 3 year old who was crying for no reason and could not be reasoned with. I even sunk so low as to bribe him. I'm ashamed but it didn't help anyway. We made it home though and he was dealt with. I'll be surprised if it happens again. Other than that bit of trouble, we are all adjusting to the big change. She's healthy and beautiful and she will kick your ass if you say otherwise. We couldn't ask for more.

The Boss and The Buffalo

Hi, yeah, so, it's been a while and my only excuse is that I'm pregnant. Very pregnant. Like, I have 5 weeks left, People. I'll keep it brief and just let you know that things are good but I'm ready for Miss Thing to arrive. Corinne Michelle is her name and she is set to be here around June 9th for those who can't recall. Meanwhile Chase continues to grow in mind, body and bossiness. Take this video below as a prime example. And yes, I know, he could have totally fit through that space with his car but my Power of The Buffalo had him convinced that he couldn't, hence keeping him confined to a smaller space. This of course also limited the area I had to run to keep up with him. Smart parenting at it's finest.

My Grandmother

I wish this post could be a little happier after being away from here for so long but unfortunately my family lost a great lady this past week. My grandmother passed away on Wednesday after years of fighting Alzheimer's. She passed away peacefully surrounded by family which is the way it should be. She held on for a few days after the family was all called in and I know she did it intentionally. Even in such a sad situation, it was nice to spend time with my extended family that I just somehow lose track of in our busy day to day lives. We caught up on what's been going on, laughed together like we always do and cried together like we've done a few too many times as well. I know my grandmother was aware of the time we were spending together and I know she was cherishing it as much as the rest of us. Our big family gatherings have always been our family's way and she was loving every second of it. I know it in my heart. I find comfort in the fact that we were able to give it to her one last time.

I'll miss you so much Grandma, but I know you are in a much better place. I'm glad you finally made it there. I love you and can't wait to see you again.

I'm not dead.

Just a little worn out, maybe. Our holidays were great but chaotic as always. We all enjoyed our family time and the time off from work too, of course. Oddly enough though, I'm just ready to get back into our routine. I feel so old for saying that. I don't know how to post anything about the holidays without it being a mile long entry, so I'll just leave you with a picture that pretty much sums up our Christmas. A dollar to the first person to find Katie (think "Where's Waldo?"). Hope your holidays were as great as ours!

Dial-a-Pansy

If there is one thing I've learned recently, it's that the three year old toddler mind is a complicated one. Chase will remember something from days ago and bring it up in random conversation with just one small thread tying it all together-much like a crazy person. I've made it somewhat of a game to find that thread and figure out just what it is so I can fully understand where Chase is coming from when he says the things he does.

So Chase and I were eating some leftovers from Thanksgiving dinner last weekend when he eyeballed my plate suspiciously.

Chase: Mommy, what's that? *points to my plate*
Me: It's cauliflower, honey.
Chase: *thinks to himself for a minute*
Chase: (Did) it answer? Daddy didn't answer his phone.

Now to the outside world, his response to my answer would make no sense. But to ME, it makes perfect sense. A week ago we tried calling Chuck on our way home from work/school. He didn't answer his phone. It was a quick moment in our life but something that obviously bothered Chase since he decided to bring it up again. However, what was the thread that brought that memory back to him? The thread was the cauliflower. You and I would have heard my answer to be "cauliflower". But Chase heard "call-a-flower". So he simply wanted to know if it answered when I called it. And for the record, no, it did not.

Happy Halloween!

Chuck and I recently stayed at The Elms Resort for a mini anniversary celebration. We did the spa thing, did dinner and had an overall good time...except for the haunting.

I was so exhausted that evening that when I fell asleep, I slept like a rock. The following weekend was when I found out that I was pregnant so I suppose that would have been the reason why. Anyway around 2:00 in the morning we began hearing some yelling. Loud yelling. Me being out of it, I only remember vaguely hearing the yelling but I never did wake up enough to remember what was being said. Chuck, however, remembers it vividly. Apparently, a man and a woman were yelling in a panic, "Everyone get out! Everyone get out!" The thing is, we heard nothing after that. Not a peep. So Chuck immediately assumed that we were being haunted and nothing was getting him out of bed. Approximately 30 minutes later, the knocking began. A steady knocking on one of the doors in the hall went on for a while and then silence. Chuck was pretty freaked out at that point so he tossed and turned the rest of the night.

The next morning he was telling me all this and I quickly wrote it off as some rowdy neighbors. While I firmly believe the existence of ghosts is possible, I've never encountered it myself so it's never been an answer to anything for me. As we were checking out however, I asked the lady at the front desk if she had ever heard of the hotel being haunted. She told me that she had never experienced anything herself but then she handed me an 8x10 laminated picture. It was a picture of a woman who was obviously in one of the guest rooms. It looked like a very ordinary picture. She was smiling at the camera and I just didn't see anything abnormal whatsoever until the television caught my eye. I wish I had a good way to describe this because just the sight of it sent chills up my spine. The television was obviously turned off but there was a definite image of a ghostly face on it. A ghostly screaming face. On the television. In the guest room. Ooooo, it still gives me the chills thinking of it.

So of course the first thing I did when I got home was googled The Elms and ghosts. It returned some very interesting results. The Elms website itself has this to say:

Over the years, the Elms has been said to be host to several spirits. The origin of these ghosts have been the source of many a 'spirited' discussion. While the hotel had seen two devastating fires, no fatalities had occurred. Rumors have persisted that one of the spirits was involved in one of the fires. The lap pool area supposedly entertains the spirit of a gambler involved with illegal activities during the speakeasy days of Prohibition. The housekeeping staff has a spiritual adviser in the form of a ghost wearing a 1920's style uniform. One thing everyone seems to agree on is the friendliness of the spirits. These gracious ghosts may act as spiritual guides to the next adventures that await the grand hotel.


The website Legends of America had this to say:

However, the Elms, like many historic hotels, is also said to play host to a couple of unearthly guests. The lap pool in the basement is said to be haunted by a man traced back to the hotel’s “speakeasy” days. During prohibition, the gangsters used to store their liquor and hold their all-night gambling parties in these blocked off rooms. The spirit is said to be that of man killed by the mob during one of these illegal drinking events.

Reportedly, on the third floor the hotel, staff and guests alike, have often seen a maid wearing a 1920s style uniform. Seemingly, she is extremely benevolent and only there to watch today’s housekeeping staff to ensure that they are doing their work correctly.

Another spirit is said to be that of a woman who walks through the hotel looking for her child. Distressed, she has been known to pull people’s hair or throw things across the room.

Both guests and staff report the feeling of an unearthly presence in several areas throughout the old hotel, as well as unexplained noises and the occasional glimpse at one of the three spirits.


Oh and for future reference yes, we were on the third floor.

So the jury is still out on whether we were actually haunted or not but it was still enough to give me the chills...and keep me away from the third floor next time we go.

The Gift of my Nightmares

Hold me.

Happy 3rd Birthday, Chase!

October 2006


November 2006


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January 2007


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October 2007

Where did he learn this?

People have been asking me how I've been feeling since I found out about the new baby on the way and really, I haven't been bad at all. I have been very tired at times over the past couple weeks but really, that's it. Lucky, I guess. Chuck and Chase have been so good about letting me crash out on the couch when I need to that I may be taking it a little for granted.

Yesterday Chase and I were at home and I just couldn't shake the drowsiness that morning. So I napped lightly on the couch while Chase played with his toys and watched a little TV. Around 11ish, Chase came over to me and told me that he was getting hungry and he wanted some peanut butter and jelly. I told him that was fine and if he woke me when Franklin was over, I would make him some lunch.

Twenty minutes passed and I heard the credits start to roll. Chase came over, pulled the blanket off of me and says, "Time to wake up, Mommy. I'm taking your blankie." Then he walked away with it!

I think sometimes he takes after his mother a little too much.

Numbered Paragraphs-My Favorite!

We've been pretty busy lately and I have quite a bit to talk about but I'll make this short and sweet. How about a few numbered paragraphs?

1. We're going to see Garth Brooks in a few weeks. Now, I'm not a country fan. At all. I know nothing of Garth's new music, nor do I have any desire (I'm sure he'll get us up to date at the concert). However the man is a cultural icon and I don't want to miss it. Plus I hear he puts on a good show...or at least he did 10 years ago. Plus! It's at the new Sprint Center here in Kansas City and that's reason enough to go right there. I'll try not to break anything.


2. We went to the zoo last weekend and had lots of fun. I rode a camel, Chase got a tattoo, it was good times.

3. We bought a new car that's growing on me. It's a 2005 Escape (essskahpay). I like it and it saves us money. Bonus.

4. Chase's 3rd birthday is quickly approaching. We're having two parties. Yes, I'm nuts, thank you. It's just that with such a big family...*sigh*...there's no excuse. Moving on.

5. Watched a great movie recently, The Prestige. Highly recommend!

6. Oh! And I'm pregnant! Yes, 4 weeks along and feeling fine. This was definitely a shock for us but that's OK. We're all very excited. June 10th is my due date as of now but I see the doctor next week. Chase has been taking it very well and seems to almost be getting it. We had a nice conversation about it and he seemed to understand. A little while after our conversation, however, he comes up to me and this is what transpired:
Chase: "Mommy, you have a baby in your tummy?"
Me: "Yes, that's right." *beaming that he caught on so quickly*
Chase: "So yummy! So yummy!"***
Me: "Hmmmm, maybe we need to review."
So yeah, he thinks I ate the baby apparently. We'll work on it a bit more.

That about wraps things up, other than the fact that we got haunted at The Elms Resort a few weeks ago. I think I'll save that story for Halloween though. OOOOOOOOOOOO! I bet you can't wait!



***If this makes no sense, please review the little green monster video in my previous post.

Yo Gabba Gabba

Move over Bob the Builder, there's a new TV king in our home. Yo Gabba Gabba is rockin' our house something fierce. The characters are great and while the music sticks in your head for days and daaaayyyyys, it's actually NOT BAD. Watch this and get back to me tomorrow. Still stuck in your head? Yeah, we can sing it together.



Oh right, and the other cool thing? Chase likes it too. I'm so proud.

My life almost ended yesterday

As I was pulling into my dad's driveway to pick up Chase yesterday, I noticed something in the path of my car. It was a short round tube, much like a toilet paper roll but I couldn't tell if it was metal or cardboard so I did my best not to run over it. I slowly got past it and as I got out of my car, I looked back to see what it was. I glanced and still couldn't really tell but I was in a hurry so I wasn't going to go back to look. I shut my car door and turned around to go inside and as I picked up my foot to take my first step, I happened to look down. I was about 3 inches from stepping on a snake!!! Oh my gosh, I can't even hardly type that without gagging. Now anyone that knows me, knows that I am DEATHLY afraid of snakes. I cannot look at them. Period. Having my foot so close to one's head is the stuff my nightmares are made of. I felt my heart leap out of my chest right that second. I screamed, turned quickly around and ran the other way. After hyperventilating for a good 30 seconds I finally got it out to Debbie why I was about to die. She calmly walked out and disposed of it. Later I found out the stupid thing was dead already. Really though, it doesn't make much difference to me. Even if I HAD known it was dead, I still would have panicked, I'm sure. Anyway, the whole time Chase is looking at me intently. I sat down on the couch and my sweet little son looked me straight in the eye and said, "Mommy, you're crazy." *sigh* I know, son, I know.

He was so excited

He was so excited to be among all the shiny new toys.



Until I reminded him that we were at Jackson's birthday party and they were
Jackson's shiny new toys. It wasn't much fun after that.

Cousins

What I have been doing

We've been pretty busy lately but I'll spare you the wordiness and just show you in pictures.

Chase went to his first Royals game.





We celebrated my aunt's husband, Clayton's, 50th birthday.



We watched Gary's first parade in the Oriental Band as a Shriner on the Fourth of July.



I went to the lake with family last week.



Had some drinks...not as many as them, though.



And just because I can.

The 60s Walk it Out

Ok,I'm way behind on updates about what I've been doing lately and really I should post about that but I HAVE to post about a video that has made me laugh nonstop recently. It's my duty to share this with the world. There is a STRONG possibility that most people have seen this already but I'm not about to take that chance.

The following video is a 60s dance routine by Bob Fosse, who apparantly was way ahead of his time. Anyway, the song is called "Mexican Breakfast", from what I gather. Watch a few moments of this but don't feel that you need to watch the entire thing. Just watch long enough to get a feel for it.



60s all the way, right? Well watch the same video below but this time it's set to "Walk it Out" by Unk. Seriously, it will brighten your day.



You're welcome.

Road Trip!

A couple weeks ago we took a little summer vacation and had a great time. We went to Branson, MO and stayed in a 4 bedroom lodge along with my dad and stepmom; my sister Katie, her husband Gary, my nephew Jackson; and my sister Mandy, her fiance Tim and my nephew Ashtin. We had a really good time and other than Chase running a fever for part of the time, we really enjoyed it. However, I did not take too many pictures but I did want to share the ones I took.


This is my dad and my nephew Ashtin on the deck of our lodge. The boys adore my dad...



as well as my stepmom, Debbie.



Chase is finally big enough this year to ride some of the kids rides at Silver Dollar City.



But the puddles were a big hit too.



Well, that about wraps it up. Like I said, I didn't take many pictures this time. We all had a great trip, even if some of us were a little Grumpy by the end.


And oh yeah, I turned 30.

*cute cat to distract*


photo courtesy of www.lolcats.com