Please meet my tongue, "Abby Normal".

I went to visit my dentist yesterday and he told me something interesting about myself that I didn't previously know. My tongue is a freak. I've been living my entire life without a care, as if I didn't have a freakish tongue. I feel like such a sham. Today, I am coming out of the tongue closet however. I HAVE A GEOGRAPHIC TONGUE! There I said it. Before you recoil in terror, let me please state that it is not contagious. So feel free to be near my tongue. It is however, fairly rare as it is present in only about 3% of the population.

Geographic tongue is basically...ok, you know how YOUR tongue is covered in small bumps? Mine is too but mine fall off sometimes. I said they FALL OFF! Not while I'm in public or anything, like ya know, I've never had to apologize for my tongue bumps falling onto the floor to a coworker or anything. I'm never aware that it's happening, just occasionally I have these bald spots on my tongue that's sensitive to hot, cold, spicy, and taunting. It's called "geographic tongue" because it kind of looks like a map. I would post a picture but I just can't seem to find one that doesn't make me want to throw up. Tongues are by nature, a little gross.

So there ya have it. I have a geographic tongue. So, next time you see my tongue, please remember, no taunting. He's sensitive.